8 Again! (Contd.)

"If you carry your childhood with you, you never become older." (Tom Stoppard)

As a kid, the world was a playing field. As a teen, the world was a stage. And now as a grown-up adult, the world is a work-field. 

As a kid, all we thought was the world was a playground and we were all players. And we came into this world just to play. Only just to play. Nothing else. Studies and schools were just a time pass. Our main purpose in this world was to play and have fun. Well, it may be true metaphorically also to a grown-up, but we never thought about it metaphorically, we always thought everything literally. We thought everything in simple terms. And far from any complications, simplicity was the way of life. But as a grown-up, we tend to complicate things. 

Those days, life was all about playing and having fun. Yes, we grown-ups do play and have fun too... now we play in the computer or mobile or playing machines. Everything is becoming digital now. But as a kid, life was full, alive and vibrant like the seas. 

Happiness curve is U-shaped

Happiness Curve (Courtesy: Daily Telegraph)

Studies have shown that life begins to recede in the late 20's and doesn't recover up until 65 and it hits rock bottom at 44. It also supports Victor Hugo's viewpoint of 40 as the old age of youth and 50 the youth of old age. All I want to say here is that childhood days are the happiest and funnest. And we tend to keep going back to those days again and again. Sadly, 40s are the grimmest. Even worse if you happen to get a bad wife. Socrates once said that if you got a bad wife, you would become a philosopher. But for good or worse, I don't know, I have become one already. Hmm, wife? Yet to find one.

In fact, a kid will never understand fully the mind of a grown-up. But sadly, a grown-up easily forgets that he was once a kid too, long time back. As a matter of fact, both belongs to the different worlds but within the same world. But above all, I still cherish those childhood days most -- in fact, mucher more than my teens days. Because I was living my life in full. But now as a grown-up, it's hard to live a life that way -- like the one I once used to as a kid. Now I am busy chasing after my dreams and money. Like chasing after the wind.

In many ways, being innocent and foolish like a kid is a great gain. In doing so, the life will become simpler free of tensions, free of strife, and free of heart failures. And the world will become a peaceful place to live. And there won't be any sleep disorders anymore. And we all will be able to sleep peacefully. Like a child again. 

Stanley Ka Dabba effect

Drizzling rain, I am half wet with a half pant, and about to be dipped in the sea 

Too much of a good stuff is a bad stuff, courtesy, The Karate Kid

I read, a few years back, the importance of observing some kind of a ritual called ME TIME. Since then whenever I can, I have been observing this ritual. Let me tell you it's been quite helpful, health wise, soul-wise, and heart wise. I call myself a busy person, though I don't know exactly what I am busy at actually. When I work, I work as if the world is going to end tomorrow. But when I sleep, you can say, I sleep no less than the old-time Kumbakarna. In fact, few of my friends do know this. So a difficult to understand person you will ever come across in your life.

And at the end of the day, being busy makes me drained out all the time without me noticing it myself. But the last three or four months have been a heck of a time for me, doing good stuffs only, not bad stuff though, but it was becoming too much for me. So I thought I would have this Me Time. A long one this time. Only 'Me' Time. No one else. Um, too selfish, nah, huh? But I have found this ritual to be soul-enriching and soul-rejuvenating. Every time I have this ritual, I come out as a renewed soul. So you will know today how renewed I am after all this.

But in essence, we are all like rechargeable batteries. We are never constant. We change all the time even though we hardly notice it ourselves. We go down and we go up. We lose and we gain. We drain out ourselves and we need to get those back again to 'soar like eagles against the wind'. It's as simple as 'in giving that we receive' equation and vice versa. But sometimes we need to receive too.

Just one month back, it was, oh, my God, unbearable. In Mumbai, the mercury soared to 40 or something. Oh, my... Yes, as it is always, the sun is splendidly generous and warm-hearted fellow, umm, like me, hmm, but when it is too generous, it is unbearable. It was too hot to bear. Poor me, I don't have ACs installed in my room. But fortunately very recently the rescuer came for us poor people from these too generous sunbeams. The Mumbai Rain. The unpredictable Mumbai rain came earlier than usual this time. Now I got a clear respite from the blazing heat. And not the least, I got myself wet in the rain. Being wet in the rain is a different feeling altogether. Wow, I didn't fall sick. Sometimes try it and see it for yourself. But please don't blame me if you get sick after doing it, though.

Stanley Ka Dabba effect     

Lately some strange things are happening in my life. But I will be writing only the good, bad... but not the ugly part. I have to keep some secret too.

I have been having this strange idea, or you can say bizarre idea, lately. Oh, I want to become an eight-year old boy all over again. If God were to give me a chance. Like they do in Project Makeover wherein a lady was given a chance to go back to her past. But unlike the movie here, I won't want to be a grown-up. I would request to God that I would want to remain a child... forever kid... and die as a kid. Somewhere like in the age of Stanley in the Stanley ka Dabba. I don't think I would be bored of being a forever child. And forever is not always forever anyway. And yes, for sure, on the other hand, you will be bored of being a forever grown-up sooner. Because both the worlds of a kid and a grown-up are entirely different things.    

As a kid, and ironically, our hearts were as huge as the ocean and as wide-open like the sky. But as a grown-up, our hearts are like dome. It has a roof now. I don't know from where this roof came from. As a kid, we never had one. Our eyes were as pure as the morning dew without a dirt. As a grown up, now we see everything through a 'stained-glass' eyes.

Those days, it was easier to make friends. All it needed was just your name. That's it. It didn't matter much how many marks you scored in Maths or Science. Or whether your parents were Doctor, or Engineer or a Carpenter. Or whether your house was beautiful made of bricks or a thatched one. Friends were all around. Now no worries for friends. Thanks to Mark Zuckerberg, we have Facebook now.

Oh, we sometimes, too, fought over some petty things. But it never lasted long. Umm, I don't know whether I should tell you this or not. All right. I am going to write this anyway because you're not going to believe this. Till my II grade, I had involved myself in fights that involved fist, kicks and what not. All kids at that age do that by the way. I was not spared from it despite being an innocent-looking chap. But since starting my III grade, I have never involved in fights with anyone till date.

It was in my grade I. Just like the Stanley and his bench-mate started the fight in the movie, it did too on that day, though we had a slightly different issue. There were five of us sitting in a bench. The problem was, I didn't want to sit in the corner against the wall. That guy too didn't want either. And because it was the last class of the day, we all wanted to run out of the class and reach home first. Sitting in the corner would mean that you would be the last person to leave the class. And I didn't want to be the last person to leave either. So we both started verbal first. Then he seemed out of control, he first punched me out of nowhere. I still don't know why he punched me on my teeth. Oooh!!! And in return, amidst the other classmates trying to dissuade us both from fighting, I managed to give a nice punch on his face. Wow. By that time, the Headmaster... not like the 'how are my kids today?' kind of Rosie teacher in the movie... came running with his famous cane-stick. [I respect this Headmaster a lot till this day]. And we both got a nice beating from him and were made to stand out of the class for the whole period. Oh, so bad! Surprisingly, I have never seen him since my grade II till this day.

Bad boy, huh?


[To be continued....]

     
   

I love you Ma!

Ma!, you're my greatest treasure
I ever received from Heavens above;
As generous and splendid as the Sun
As tireless and strong as the Wind
As friendly and faithfulness as the Trees
As kind and gentle as the Rain Drops 
As enchanting and magnificent as the Rainbow after the rain
As melodious and comforting as the Songbirds at Dawn
As vivacious and charming as the Sunrise
And as beautiful and loving as you are
And I know these few words of mine 
Are like tiny drops compared to Ocean
Even then, for all that you have been and 
for all that you are to me, I proudly say:
"All that I am, or hope to be,
I owe to you...my angel Mother"
I love you Ma!

Ma!, I pray for your good health and pray to God to add many more years to live!

Here's wishing to all moms out there a Happy Mother's Day! 

Green ATMs and Brown ATMs

People standing in line to withdraw their cash from ATM (Source: E-pao.net)

I was on a trip to my native place recently. And on that fateful day, I needed to withdraw some cash from ATM. And I needed it desperately for some urgent needs. But I never knew it would be so ho-hum task just to withdraw your money from a machine called ATM. Technology may be advanced and already borne fruits elsewhere but in Manipur, it is just the opposite.

Around 7 o’clock in the morning that day, I, with my younger brother, drove out from my house to withdraw some cash from nearby ATM. And Canchipur (Imphal) SBI ATM came to mind first. So we drove towards Canchipur SBI ATM. By the time we reached Manipur University Gate, three commando personnel were already there guarding the ‘fortress’. Few years ago when I visited there then, I hardly saw commandos there at MU gate. But maybe due to the unfotunate incidents that happened in the not too long ago past, now Manipur University has become a 'fortress' now. Just as we were about to enter the MU gate, one commando personnel rushed towards us and enquired about our visit with a growling voice from his throat, as if we were deaf. And I told him politely that we were coming to fetch some cash from the SBI ATM inside the campus. But in return, in a hoarse and grumbling voice, without any provocation, he said that there was no cash at that time and you could come at 11 o’clock. It was almost deafening. It might have been much better if he said it politely, and I guess, in doing so, he could have saved more calories during that 10 second long speech.

Without a doubt, our first destination bore not fruit. I told my brother that we should go straight to Secretariat SBI, Imphal. By the time we reached Secretariat SBI, some thirty people were already there standing in line and one of them said to us that we could only check balances but not withdraw cash. Because money was not there in the ‘automated terror machine’. Elsewhere this machine is called Automated Teller Machine. But once it reaches Manipur, it becomes ‘Automated Terror Machine’.

Our second destination too proved futile. Then we drove towards SBI Thangal Bazar, the main MG Avenue SBI office in Manipur. And I was stunned to see some 200 people standing in queque outside the ATM from a distance. By the time we reached the ATM, the only words I could utter was, ‘Oh, my gosh!’ and no further words came out. We all need cash desperately at some point and we do anything to acquire it. But in this, it’s nobody’s money; it’s your money after all. People don’t mind standing in queue the whole day if they see a ray of hope that they would get cash at the end of the day. No matter what.

Our third destination also failed. I won’t think it twice if I was going to stand in queque for five-six hours just to withdraw my money from a machine called ATM. We then proceeded towards AXIS Bank, also in Thangal Bazar, Imphal. We were delighted to see a few people standing in line just outside the AXIS ATM. And the security guard inside the ATM assured us that money would be coming at 11 o’clock. So we joined the line that was already there.

Now it’s already 10:00 am. My brother and I exchanged line from time to time. And the scorching sunbeam was overhead and was showering abundantly, heavily heated airwaves over our head. And I was sweating profusely. Poor people us! That day, the sun was ungenial, the ATM was unmerciful.

Standing in the sun outside the ATM was an awkward and tiresome. In such situation, just to spend the time, gossip was the only way to keep the spirit high. There was a middle-aged man, maybe in the early 50s or so, among the queue liners. He was talking to someone who was already there with him before we joined them. “ATMs in Mumbai, Delhi, Bangalore and other cities elsewhere in India have ‘green’ ATMs”, he said. “You won’t see people there standing in queue like we do here now. There is always availability of cash in the ATM machine, 99.99% of the case, 24x7. In Manipur, it’s just the opposite. Here in Manipur, ATM machines are cash-starved and are always on a ‘hunger strike mode’. These machines here in Manipur are ‘brown’ ATMs”. I was listening to him, too, from a distance.    

The person who was listening to the middle-aged man looked inquisitive, and asked him, “Why do you call those ATMs elsewhere in India Green ATMs and Brown in Manipur?

The man thoughtfully cleared his throat and started slowly with a question to the listener. “Were you passing those traffic signals while coming here? The listener nodded in affirmative. The man continued further, “Did you see the green light there?” The listener said yes and nodded his head in realization.

The man continued like a good teacher, “At traffic point, green light lets you proceed and you’re not supposed to standstill there the moment green light comes. In other words, you are free to flow. Free flow of movement starts. So ATMs elsewhere in India are just like that. These machines are ready to give you cash at any point in time. They are always 'green.' Another thing is that green also symbolizes friendliness. They don’t terrorize you at all. Instead, they instill in you a sense of trust, hope and a sense of worthiness.” Everybody there in the line was nodding their head in agreement, including myself.

He continued, “But here in our once-known little paradise, it’s just the opposite. These machines are not ‘friendly’ at all. Instead, they instill in you a sense of fear, insecurity and hopelessness. Now you are standing in queue, like all of us, not knowing with certainty that you will return home with your cash back. Sometimes you get and most of the time we all return home empty handed. That’s why I call ATMs in Manipur ‘brown’, a node better than being ‘black’.”

After a pause, he added, “After all, you don’t have to blame these machines. It’s the system that manages.”

It was around 11 o’clock now, and to our utter dismay, we were informed by the security guard that money was not coming that day. And in no time, the long queue was disappeared like the mists do in the sunbeam in the early morning. Some people were grumbling, some people disappeared slowly and silently. And I and my brother visited my brother-in-law’s shop in Thangal Bazar nearby for sometime.

And we returned home empty handed, like the rest of the liners.
  

Milky Way Video Wows Web

This was filmed between 4th and 11th April 2011 on El Teide, Spain´s highest mountain.

(Courtesy: Yahoo!)

Home is where your heart is...

It's so truly said. Home is truly where your heart always longs to be.

I felt a bit nostalgic these days from being away from home quite a bit longer than usual. Usually I visited home every year in December, until 2008, as I like winter season in Manipur. Winter season, I like the most, because I get to eat all those delicious mouthwatering Manipuri foods which I have been missing for quite a long time now. But this time I couldn't wait till December. And I am already at Home Sweet Home. No matter how ugly it looks to be, it is always sweet. Because your heart is always there.

I don't know why it can't be so in love. We despise ugly, we disdain them. We always extol and praise the beauty. Nothing wrong with that. We always do that. But God created all, whether it's ugly or beautiful. He created them all 'bright and beautiful.' So why can't ugly be beautiful, because He created them all? In fact, there should not be any ugly as such. A bit philosophical here but anyway I am trying to find one that people say is ugly, but that, to me, is the most beautiful for myself. I will tell you the day I find.

Now at home, there is constant blackout. Most of the time, or throughout 24 hours, there is no power. It's no new news to many. But it's utterly uncomfortable when you have come down from a city like Mumbai. But  you have to accept it because it's Manipur, not Mumbai. People here are used to it and are not complaining about it. And I sigh, it's a long way to go.

Now I'm already getting bored with only two days here at home. Those college days are gone and most of my friends are now either married, or away from home like me. It's true somehow that married and bachelors do not go along very well... even the best friends too. After getting married, somehow people change and seem different. Another thing is that they are always busy. And those days when we used to have plenty of time at our disposal are gone. But anyway I do not regret coming back home whenever I like.  

Fortunately, a friend of mine (an IAF pilot) was at home on Sunday, yesterday and he was free and had to go somewhere the day after and busy thereafter. After a gap of four years we met. We drove around the Imphal city and saw not much change though since I last saw them. But I noticed something when we reached Khuman Lampak. Eviction drive was going on around Khuman Lampak area. In some way, it's disheartening to see it taking place. It's not new to me, though. It happens in Mumbai everyday. And it's an inevitable price people have to pay. Because their buildings and shops were there in the wrong place. Development always comes with a price and people have to pay for it for the benefit of the common mass and for the several generations to come.

Eviction drive at Khuman Lampak

Sadly, the land space doesn't grow with time. It's only getting smaller. Population of not only people, but vehicles are all the more growing at an astronomical rate. And they add to the enormity of the problems of congestion in the city.

Another beauty or sweetness of home is family bonding -- the bond of love. It's kind of a get-together celebration in some way. In fact, my family feels the completeness with me being at home. And being away from home in a stranger's land may not bring you that completeness of joy. In your native place, you are completely at 'home and in sync'. That is the power of home sweet home.

Because anyone who knows love loves home. Because you are in love with 'home' whether it's ugly or nice, whether it's thatched or bricked.

To my dear Darling...! [A Follow-up from DREAMGIRL]

Dear Darling,

It's my first time I am writing to you declaring my unwavering love and undivided commitment that I have for you. However, you may find yourself stunned and off-guarded to see my writing and also to hear that I am your husband from the future in a time machine. Now I am in the middle of 2012. I guess, I am a little bit ahead of you into the future in time, and I am sure you may be somewhere in the year 2011. So please try to understand me.

Just to refresh your memory as a bit of background, some years ago, I wrote a poem about you, called 'DREAMGIRL' on my blog: SINGJU ONLINE. It's a lovely poem about you. And I waited a long time for you but you never showed up. Being an impulsive and impatient lover, I couldn't wait any longer. So I went into the future in a time machine only to find myself getting married with you... my DREAMGIRL.  Just to find you was a dream come true. And I thought I'd better despatch this reciprocation online through the ubiquitous internet.

Now that you are by my side, a lovely wife, I'm the happiest man on earth, and I hope you'll too. As I had hoped, you are such a special someone that I had dreamed of. Yes, you may not be the most beautiful woman on earth but you are the sweetest and the most lovely one I've ever met. And you fill my heart -- the whole of it. Full of love. And you make my little world a pleasant place to live.

Being with the woman of my dream is a wonderful thing to have. You are the first ray of sunlight that fills my room and wakes me up at dawn. You are the sound of those little melodious singing birds in the early morning that spreads the word of peace and love. Your sweet whispers of love and the touches of your soft lips to my hot lips do all the wonders that the world can't do. What a beautiful day to begin with, with such a lovely wife by my side.

Your sweet scent of your silky long hair gives such a warm comfort to my heart. Your bell-tingling sound like laughs, when I crack jokes, makes me soar to the highest high of the universe. Your child-like smile makes me joy and drives away all my fears. Darling, what a beautiful smile you have!

You know what, we do a little different than most couples do. We make love mostly at dawn. At the beginning, you didn't agree with me. But now we do make love mostly at dawn. And I see your happy smiles. You know what, making love at dawn, as people say, keeps your heart healthy and makes you look young and fresh. And no matter what happens, it makes you happy and helps keep your mood high and jolly throughout the day. It's turned out to be true. And I see you smiling and laughing throughout the day. And it makes me a happy man.

Darling, I'll tell you something very important at closing. Now I know why God created woman. To make her man happy.  

Until the times meet.

Lots of Love and lots of Kisses.

Your Husband,

Pangamba777

[On Time Machine]